Clear Conscience

I have been plagued a lot lately with thoughts of insecurity, as I'm sure all of us are at one time or another. I have come to feel strongly that these feelings are a tool of the devil, to keep us from doing as much good as we can. It seems when I feel upset about something I've done or the way I've acted, I only further my sadness by thinking I can never do it and I'm not good enough and why try? Are these thoughts from a loving Heavenly Father? I do not think so--the devil wants us to despair and feel hopeless. He wants us to feel like God expects too much of us and that his (the devil's) way is easier and better. Well maybe in the short term, but certainly not after. Satan can never give us blessings. Only misery comes when we heed his temptations.

A lot of us put extremely high expectations on ourselves and become our own worst critics. I know I have a very hard time forgiving myself, even after I know God has. This is damning me and only hurting my influence for good on others around me. If I want to be the kind of person God wants me to be, I have to let Him help. It seems like I always try alone to feel worthy of God's help, but really, all of us are worthy of God's help to start with, no matter what we've done or what we do. President Ezra Taft Benson said, "People who turn their lives over to God will find out that he can make a lot more out of their lives than they can. He will deepen their joys, expand their vision, quicken their minds, strengthen their muscles, lift their spirits, multiply their blessings, increase their opportunities, comfort their souls, raise up friends, and pour out peace." Wow! How can we not turn to God? Easier said than done, right? But we must have HOPE in Him, that if we never give up trying to do good and follow Him, that we will have promised blessings that we cannot even imagine! From the book of Ether, "Wherefore, whoso believeth in God might with surety hope for a better world, yea, even a place at the right hand of God, which hope cometh of faith, maketh an anchor to the souls of men, which would make them sure and steadfast, always abounding in good works, being led to glorify God."

We cannot get bogged down with the things of the world and the negative messages we receive from all around us, and maybe even ourselves. We cannot let the devil in and make us think we do not matter or that we are too weak or flawed to make any difference in the world. What matters is God's opinion of us and no one else's. Others may find fault with us, we may offend others without intending to, we may cause pain to friends or family that is hard to repair, we may find ourselves on a path of sin and unhappiness. But if we do our best to repent and make amends, we will be blessed. We cannot control another's choices. "For man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart." Only He knows us as no one else does and if our conscience is void of offense towards Him and towards others, that is all that matters. We are loved, if by no one else, by a loving and caring Father in Heaven and His Son, Jesus Christ. How much hope we should have that we will receive blessings we cannot even comprehend if we are faithful! "But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him." 1 Cor. 2:9 Don't give up!